A SHORT STORY  

This is a follow-up to the previous ‘little kid’ story. It is about Joy.

After many years of periodic ‘depression’ in which felt as though I was completely draped in a sodden, heavy, wool blanket, I allowed myself to stay with the grief of that lonely little kid. The deep sobs lasted on and off for several days. It was the best thing I have done for myself, but not at all comfortable.

I believe I am finally beginning to understand my ‘depression.’

It is that sensitive little kid I buried inside and ignored by my actions of ‘politeness’ when I truly felt otherwise.*** She was desperately trying to get my attention with many years of periodic bouts of darkness. I medicated her with higher and higher dosages of anti-depressants. She prevailed.

So, after days of tears, I woke up one morning and felt sunshine inside.  A light following darkness?  Hummmmm

I joined friends for Easter and had a wonderful day with very dear people. Woke up the next day and the happiness was still there!

Each day after, the joy continued. I found so much to laugh about – mostly my own goofy responses to things.

I put on a ratty old sweatshirt and saw the color in a brand-new way.  A terrible pun spurted right out of my mouth, “The yolk’s on me”!

For a week, the grinning continued. My joy has now settled into a smiling peaceful space inside. I am certain this will change as is the nature of all things. I will see how/when/if that tenacious child rears her head again.

Until then, I’m enjoying remembering that I was also a funny kid.

(That’s me on the ground, my cousin Thayer on Major and her son, David in her lap)

*** More on that if you are interested.