To compare          11.8.25

Comparing yourself to another is deadly.  We either end up feeling ‘less than’ or ‘more than’ yet most of us do it without even thinking.  

Our ancestors’ survival often depended on being aware of who to follow, who to trust and how to maintain one’s place in the group. To a large extent our brains remain wired this way.

This appraisal tool can motivate us to excel or achieve more by determining who is better at their job, sport or other endeavor. When I was a stockbroker, (1970’s verbiage) the daily commissions we earned were posted where every other broker could see them. Personally, I am not motivated in that manner, but many are. I only lasted 7 years in the business.

Social media amplifies this ancient tendency by giving us constant, carefully chosen snapshots of other people’s lives. It feeds the comparison instinct, often without offering a full, realistic context.

I can definitely fall into the comparison trap, especially as my body ages. I am surrounded by lean, fit equestrians who age from 15 to 60. I can easily judge myself as less than. I must stay vigilant and remind myself I am nudging 78 years old and senescence is apparent. Some days are more difficult than others especially when arthritis discomfort flares up.

I find comparisons deadly as it hurts us inside. It certainly diminishes my opinion of myself, the true self I have worked so diligently to unearth. It doesn’t feel good in my heart, my spirit or sense of well-being.

I imagine your comparisons hurt you as well.

If you find yourself comparing, please take a moment for a kind, deep breath and remember who you truly are. A unique and special being like no other.

Hopefully and with Grace, Elizabeth